The Oler Family: Ashley

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Ashley

This past Saturday I had the opportunity to go through the temple with the family of a very dear friend of mine who was killed in a car crash a year ago June 9th. My heart aches for this family as I try to imagine how it would feel to lose a child. One of a father's 2 children, a brother's little sister, a mother's only daughter, and a fiance's sweetheart, Ashley was a great friend to everyone she met and could always make you laugh. It was a bitter sweet situation, one I had never experienced before. A wonderful and happy occasion knowing she is on the other side finally enjoying the blessing of being endowed in the temple. But sad and heartbreaking to know that she wasn't able to experience in her short life herself.

My first night in Fountain Green was spent on her basement floor. Not knowing a soul my parents shipped us off to Girl's Camp for our soon to be ward. Her Mom, Denice, was in the Young Women's presidency. Talk about being thrown into an experience. Our friendship took off from there. I always get a little teary eyed thinking of her, missing her silly jokes, and the great times we had skipping class, or having a lazy day on a porch swing, waiting for our latest interests to drive by. I get choked up hearing a certain song or two that was one of our favorites to sing in the car. Thinking of her, even after all this time still hurts, but it a good hurt, if that makes any sense. My mom described it as healing and I think it fits well.

I just felt the need to put my feelings out there and to honor her and the wonderful person that she was in this life and still is on the other side. Love you and miss you Marge

6 comments:

ShEiLa said...: That was a sweet tribute to a dear friend. I have done the same thing in the past.

My mother wrote some really cool things in her journal 29 years ago... about the Logandale YW accident way back when... you should read it. If you have time.[http://elaineheywoodmurry.blogspot.com/2009/06/from-elaines-journal.html]

ToOdLeS.; June 15, 2009 at 7:21 PM
Andrea said...: Love you, Gelic. And love you too Ashley!!! I'm so happy you got to go through the temple with her family. I'm only beginning to grasp the blessings avaliable to us from the temple and I'm looking forward to going through myself in the next few months. As heartbreaking as it was to lose Ashley, I'm so glad that we know that she's okay and in a better place and has another Daddy watching over her. Love you both!; June 15, 2009 at 9:30 PM
Jake and Cheryl said...: Wow I can't believe its been a year already. I think about her all the time and some times I swear I see her and then I take a second look and its not her. I miss her so much! Our friendship faded away the last couple of years but she still had a special spot in my heart. I love the memories I have of her. I'm so glad you got to go with her family for her.; June 16, 2009 at 8:47 PM
Nate and Felicia said...: It was a pretty amazing experience and you could deffinitely feel her presence there. You know she is happy but you still ache for her family. Thanks for writing about it, I wanted to myself, but I am not good at expressing my feeling by writing like you are. Thanks Gelic. I miss her dearly and I often have similar moments as you described. Love you!; June 20, 2009 at 4:17 PM
The Burns said...: Angelica this was so sweet! Ashley was an amazing girl, and she is very missed!; June 23, 2009 at 12:51 PM
Brandon and Amanda Brady said...: I was so sad when I found out about Ashley a year or so ago. My heart goes out to her family as well. She was a great girl, and an awesome cousin. Thanks for posting this.; June 30, 2009 at 9:06 AM

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The Story

We found out we were expecting our first mid-March 2008, our little bundle of joy would arrive sometime early November. June rolled around, we went to find out if it was a boy or a girl. Much to our excitement, it was a girl, much to our surprise, she had a sister in there too. We were so excited, and shocked at the same time. And because there were 2 the doctor moved my due date up to early October. Mid-September comes up and I'm sent to the hospital, I'm in labor. Evelyn Mae and Adia Ashley were born the morning of September 23rd.

The Story Take III

We found out we were expecting #4 in early June, not quite ready to share the news we kept our excitement to ourselves for a while. We told the kids but were fairly certain they had forgotten when Neil's whole family came, visited, and left without a word about our bun in the oven. A couple of weeks later, we had some family over for a 4th of July BBQ. Evelyn was admiring Chavonne's 5 month old Emmett and decided to announce "Angelica has a baby in her belly!" Everybody was excited and I was very surprised since I had decided my kids had forgotten. I moving into the 2nd trimester now, and looking forward to finding out the gender of our sweet little love bun.

Ghost In A Jar

Neil sings and plays guitar in a band called Ghost In A Jar. With his friends Tom at the drums, and Peter playing the bass, they started playing together in April of 2006. They've played at a lot of different places including Starry Night, Muse, and The Loft at Ozz in Provo, Comedy Circuit in Midvale, and at various other places and events. Its been fun to listen to them progress and work on writing their songs and having such a great time together. Sadly in April of 2011 they went their separate ways.